#Real talk

It's been good guys. Thanks to those who read and commented.

-Icarus Greer

I remember

The things I do remember: The house I grew up in. I lived in a few different houses growing up but one sticks out, it's the only place I remember feeling like an actual home. I remember thinking beer tasted like soda, until my dad let me try a sip and I discovered the regretful truth. I remember my first kiss, I remember sharing my first/last cigarette with 6 other people, I remember every time I my mom cries because of me, and I remember hating myself.

The things I don't remember: I don't remember why stopped talking to the only girl who has ever wanted to date me. I don't remember ever wanting to do drugs. I don't remember what I wanted to do with my life for the past few years. I don't remember what my thoughts were when I was rejected because of my religious beliefs, and just saying, you didn't know what they were you just what they weren't. I don't remember why I ignored the only person that has ever cared about me as much as i cared about them.

#Blackout

When I go to college, i'll die.
When I get married, i'll die some more.
When I have my first kid, i'll die even more.
When I retire, i'm dead.

My life will eventually be the death of me.

The one thing i don't want is to fall into my own life.

We only get one life, but i already messed up everything.

I'm almost done with high school and I feel like I've barely left my house since elementary school.

My dad has all these stories from his high school days. 

I just think about what stories i'll tell my kids, but i don't have any.

Anyone reading this probably just thinks i'm a shy loser who's too afraid to ask anyone to hang out.

But i've tried hard to make friends.

Everyone has an excuse not to hang with me.

But, i don't really care what other people think tho.

HoW 2

How to be a slave to society:

1. Make yourself look good, but don't stand out.

2. Get a car. You can't be ride a bike! (bikes are only for working out and kids.)

3. Get a nice house in a new suburb that used to be a forrest.

4. Get a job like accounting or marketing.

5. Drink starbucks.

6. Date someone.

7. Scroll through Facebook like a brainless zombie, liking post by people you couldn't care less about.

8. base your opinions of what other people think, not what you think.

How to know if you're a slave to society:

1. If you lie to yourself

colors

I sit there, in the dark, changing colors.

When you flip the light switch my eyes bleed
and i respectfully ask for the lights to be left off.

No, you're not ugly, it's just that your face brings me to reality.

And reality hurts.

Life Of Leisure